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"Our lives are a book that has already been written. The brilliance of the plan is that we are only given a chapter at a time..." ~A. Drayton Boylston

Thursday, July 03, 2014

Rainbow Around the Corner

I took this picture yesterday after a thunderstorm, just around the corner from my house.  It's difficult to not be frustrated when technology doesn't quite capture the beauty of something.  The rainbow I saw was more vivid than this picture, with brightly defined colors.  But alas... This is how the photo came out.


Letting Him Go

There are days when I think "I've got this" and there are days when I know there's still a long road ahead.


Thursday, May 22, 2014

Oysters

With over 500 miles of driving this past weekend, I’ve had lot of time to listen to Tori Amos’ new album “Unrepentant Geraldines”. I think the whole album is awesome, but there are a handful of songs I really love. The duet with Tori and her teenage daughter Natashya, called “Promise”, about a mother and daughter promising to always be there for each other is very heartfelt. By far my favorite is “Oysters”…. which is a very relevant song for me right now…. about aging and getting back to yourself. The “turn” part is sung very beautifully…. you have to hear it to really know why I love the song. 


There is finally a fan-made video for the song that recently popped up on YouTube:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4FAR4InJ9wQ

You can also hear the beautiful rendition of the song by the PS22 Chorus:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fEdp9mda26A

Here are the lyrics:


so can these shoes take me to
who I was before
I was stabbing my sticks into
a vulnerable earth
and I can almost out run you
and those stalking memories
did I somehow become you
without realizing
found a little patch of heaven now
so then I’m gonna turn oysters in the sand
‘cause I’m working my way back
I’m working my way back to me again
not every girl is a pearl
with these ruby slippers
with these ruby slippers
so then I’m gonna turn oysters in the sand
in the sand
turn
turn
turn
and there are forces of conflict
taking portions of my mind
in whose realm laced with trickery
the fragments I must find
and I can almost out run you
and those stalking memories
did I somehow become you
without realizing
found a little patch of heaven now
so then I’m gonna turn oysters in the sand
‘cause I’m working my way back
I’m working my way back to me again
not every girl is a pearl
with these ruby slippers
with these ruby slippers
so then I’m gonna turn oysters in the sand
turn
turn
not every girl is popular
popular
popular
not every girl is a pearl
with these ruby slippers
with these ruby slippers
so then I ‘m gonna turn oysters in the sand
in the sand
in the sand
turn
turn
turn 


Sunday, March 30, 2014

My Heaven

Days pass slowly
I wait to be in my heaven
With the rain... The stars... The smell of sky
And your lips touching mine.
My heart misses yours
And the days I could touch it.
I remember...but you forgot
As you're safe in the darkness
And I am not.
I miss you, but I can't explain why
We were never as close in this life
Than we were long ago.
So I wait for a new one
Where I am wrapped in your arms
And I hear you whisper
"Don't go."

Monday, March 24, 2014

Cleanse and Diet Started

I have started on a colon cleanse and diet of mainly raw food today.  I had the intention of posting a "before" photo, but was too embarrassed to post the pic, so just keeping it for my own reference.  I'd post my starting weight, but that is also too embarrassing :(  In particular, my eternally pregnant looking belly has been a source of shame for pretty much most of my life.

Ever since I started dating after being separated, I gained a lot of the weight I had lost while going to GISW (Get in Shape for Women) in Nashua, working with a personal trainer.  A quote from Marsha Mason in one of my favorite movies, Goodbye Girl, comes to mind... "It's amazing how flabby you get when you're happy".  Happiness may have been the reason for a while... But I basically just stopped caring as much about what I looked like.  If course, it didn't help that my boyfriend eats like a kid whose parents are away on my vacation... And he can afford to since he's very thin.

Basically I began by making my home binge proof and getting rid of all the sweets and unhealthy snack food.  I bought mostly fruits and vegetables... Tofu, tempeh and seasonings that are healthy and I actually really do love.  Greek yogurt, cottage cheese, hummus and snap pea crisps for snacks.

I purchased an herbal cleanse kit at one of my favorite herbal stores... Misty Meadows in Lee NH, which is a two part/two week intestinal repair program.  It's gentle and will prepare my body for the more aggressive Master Cleanse... Which consists of  drinking a lemon, maple syrup, Ceyenne pepper concoction in place of three meals, drinking a laxative tea before bed, and lots of plain water throughout the day.  My herbalist informed me that the Master Cleanse can be quite dangerous if jumped into immediately... So the gentle herbal cleanse will be first.

I also quit drinking diet soda (yet again), and this time I am determined to quit for good.

I'm heading back to the gym with a vengeance too.  I make up excuses not to go, but am usually more than ready to workout once I get there.

I'm looking forward to seeing what I can accomplish in the next few weeks.  Hopefully I will have good results to report :)